Twin Pregnancy

With the twins’ first birthday coming up, I have been spending a lot of time thinking about the past year and thinking about my pregnancy. I am very thankful that while carrying the twins I had no serious issues, but that being said, the pregnancy was HARD. I was tested every day. My babies were so worth it, but for anyone wondering if me and James will be expanding our family, for now I am going to say no.

I have already touched on how bad the morning sickness was. For three months I lived with my head in a trash can or toilet, even with the medication. I had such bad popped blood vessels in my eyes that they were almost 60% red. I lost 15 pounds in 2 weeks. The first trimester was nothing short of a nightmare. I threw up in the bushes at Disneyland. I threw up at a vineyard during the reception of my sister’s wedding, but mostly I threw up every night from 11pm-4am. Me and Netflix got very acquainted during that time.

Things got better in the second trimester, for a little while anyways. The puking stopped. I was gaining weight quickly but that was mostly because if I didn’t keep my stomach full I would violently dry heave. An empty stomach was the quickest way to sickness for me. I started getting energy back. Up until 27 weeks, I really did feel good. I would say this was the only good time while I was pregnant.

Around 28 weeks the round ligament pain got BAD. I remember the first night we were in Wisconsin and crying to my mom and mother-in-law because I was in so much pain. It felt like I was being repeatedly stabbed in the stomach. I had to wear a crazy support belt that was far from comfortable, but it helped with the pain. I thought at that point we would be okay. It was just growing pains.

I would rather take morning sickness all day every day over PUPPS, which is what I developed the last THREE MONTHS of my pregnancy. Pupps is an insane rash that starts on the stomach but can spread. It is quite literally a reaction to pregnancy and there was really nothing that could be done to help. I had to shower with Pine Tar soap so I smelled like a camp fire all the time. The scars I have on my stomach from PUPPS are way worse than my stretch marks. PUPPS didn’t go away until I delivered, but then it came back for a week and spread to my arms, legs, and hands.

I remember everything I went through. I remember I was in pain and miserable. I remember feeling like it would never end, but all those horrible memories feel so insignificant compared to the memories that came after. From the morning sickness came Amelia’s giggle. From PUPPS came Grayson’s determined crawl and wild spirit. To anyone struggling with pregnancy: it is hard. It feels like it will never end, but at the end you will hold your baby (or babies) and it will all be worth it.

I wish I knew then what I know now. I wish I could show pregnant me how worth it all the pain was. Will I get pregnant again? Probably not. If I do, I can 100% promise it was an accident, but if I had to go back in time I would still do it all over again because the outcome would be Grayson and Amelia.